Rough weekend.

7/2/13

Well, it’s actually been one of the best weekends I’ve had because I got to go to Costco (holla at me, bulk wholesale!), I actually kinda enjoy tourists (might change in the next few days), and I went shopping! The tourist scene may be sickening to some, but everyone is so lively and excited to be here, and there are lots of cool things going on! On Sunday we went to an illumination of the battlefields for all the fallen soldiers, which I thought was SO cool.

Yes, I know, shopping=consumerism=evil of the Earth, Costco is an exception, and going to the Outlets was a refreshing getaway from my responsibilities, if only for a little while, buy clothes and tell myself it’s okay to use clothes to define myself.

Still, this morning (and the rest of the day) I was feeling too sluggish to put on real clothes and wore a tshirt and shorts :/ I think I’m getting to that point in the summer where I am losing the energy that I came into the summer with. The poverty simulation, which I have been working on has so many weird kinks that I am guessing is the accumulation of years of using it. Being the detailed and obsessive person I am, I start off with fixing one thing, and then realize that the pencils aren’t sharpened and start sharpening them, then start organizing the pencils in the storage closet, and organize the sticky notes when I should have been working on assigning social security numbers. I also think it may be that I might have trouble dealing with things that overwhelming. I fixate on something that I can fix, but it’s not what I was setting out to fix and then I feel upset that I’m not making progress. Maybe I just need to cut out one thing at a time and not look at the imperfections of the other parts so I can keep moving forward.

I’m hoping that our kind-of four day weekend will help me recharge and get me back to being excited about making color-coded name tags again… Helena

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